Parenting Coordinator Concept
A lack of research, a lot of self-interested trade promotion.
Also see article
Coordination, a bad idea and
The URL for this webpage is: http://www.thelizlibrary.org/parenting-coordination/parenting-coordinator.html
Petty Tyranny, judge/boss
wannabes, neighborhood yentas... Here's an example from
the co-parents improve at finding loopholes in agreements, while avoiding
accountability. They are uncanny in getting various professionals in the
system to argue amongst each other. Eventually, these characterlogically
disordered co-parents learn that the Parenting Coordinator only has the
power to help them mediate conflict and the co-parents aren't interested
in that, only in controlling, and hurting their co-parent, while gaining
control and satisfaction in the process. Also, they grow wary of the process
because they believe that PC doesn't work, saying in exasperation, 'there
is no accountability'. Interestingly, this is a retort said not looking
in the mirror, but pointing their finger at the co-parent sitting across
from them in my office.
the process disintegrates into co-parent accusations of Parenting Coordinator
incompetence, bias, and collusion with the divorce industry. I've heard
many of complaints including, 'I've lost respect for you, you have no power
to do anything about this", 'If we are supposed to be meeting with you
to keep us out of court why has [my co-parent] taken me to court time and
time again while meeting with you? This makes no sense to me, we now get
to pay lawyers fees and your fees. I guess that works well for you guys.'
disintegrating process is frustrating for Parenting Coordinators like me.
I am interested in solving problems rather than being powerless in the
middle of problems..."
Convenient, no-lose, blame-the-parents
idea when it only makes things worse! Incredible. Get divorced, and
this yahoo advocates that you become subject to the equivalent of dependency
court. Here's a father expressing how sorry he is at having gone this route,
second meeting we had she made a point along with the EX to attack everything
we had to say, demanded that we keep our mouths shut while the other party
talked yet the other party could interupt us while we were talking...This
lady has been a night mare for us... I thought the whole reason for having
a med. was to make things go smoothly, no stress, and take BOTH sides into
Another parenting coordinator
if this guy even has any parenting experience himself). It's a psychic
vampire's wet dream,
-- A final element in the systemic approach is the appropriate use of sanctions.
The [parenting coordinator] can, and in most cases must, insist on certain
behaviors such as the restoration of civility in communication. The PC
must be able to decide on discrete changes to parenting time, exchange
procedures, and restrictions to parenting time through the judicious use
of sanctions." -- Bill J. Fyfe's Spring-2001 newsletter essay "A
Systemic Approach to Entrenched High Conflict Divorce"
Think carefully before
you consent to this nonsense; don't allow it without a fight. Also from
parents wanted the child to participate in cheerleading. The coordinator
decided against cheerleading! She felt the parents were setting the wrong
priorities and that the child needed to understand that parenting time
was more important than social activities.
coordinator also told the judge that the child was a "mediocre"
student and that the parents needed to understand that they should be putting
more of the energy into supporting their child academically and worry less
about social activities.
parents' joint motion was for the parenting coordinator to be dismissed
and they each filed additional motions: hers asking that visitation be
set 45min later. His asking that pickup is allowed at school.
judge dismissed all 3 motions in favor of the coordinator stating it was
in the best interests of the child..."
course you can find opinions going both ways. But is that how you want
to handle your case, with an unaccountable dictator whose personal opinions
will be a crap shoot? Why not just flip a coin... And don't underestimate the power of commercial websites and trade organizations putting out opinions -- or "researching" and evaluating their own money-making ideas!
coordination (by other names) is not that new, of course. In California, home of the AFCC, special
masters and recommending mediators have been causing problems for many
years. (California is the state that in the olden days before no-fault divorce had the psychologist-dominated reconciliation courts, the downfall of which courts led to the creation of the AFCC and "therapeutic jurisprudence" initiatives to market the same mental health services in divorce courts.) These people also are called "wise persons" and "case
managers" in some states. From another website, parents complaining:
May, 2008 my husband had told the Parenting Coordinator assisgned to his
case that he was going to ask the Wayne County (Detroit) Court to remove
her from the case because she made 2 binding decisions regarding his daughter
with his former wife. In both cases she made these decisions without his
input, only used info. provided by his ex-wife, and refused to meet with
him (that's a whole different situation-not my question). The Parenting
Coordinator was irate with my husband when he told her this, via telephone,
told him off and hung up on him. Though their Agreement to Arbitrate clearly
stated what she could and could not do, she decided that she was going
to "temporarily suspend his parenting time" after he told her
he was going to ask that she be removed, this was clearly addressed in
the agreement as something she could not do. When my husband got to see
the Judge a few weeks later he decided to allow the Parenting Coordinators
Decision to stand, but that he was going to have a Guardian Ad Litem investigate
recently found out that the Judge's Law Clerk, was in fact, also the "husband"
of the Parenting Coordinator..."
And look at the double standards:
QUESTION ON PSYLAW-L LISTSERVE, June 29, 2010: "I was wondering if I could
have the sage advice of those on the list. I
have a case of a man who daughter (15 months) is about to be put up for adoption... history of harassing...
The issue now is post adoption contact and whether he should be allowed
photographs of his daughter annually..."
ANSWER ON PSYLAW-L LISTSERVE, June 29, 2010:
"Your question addresses the risk of stalking harm to the girl. There are
other risks to consider as well, most notably the potential for impairment
of the adopting parents' sense of security around making authoritative
decisions about the girl. I'd recommend leaving it up to them, as I would
any parenting decision not clearly right or wrong. Besides fostering a
normal parenting relationship around decision-making, this policy also
fosters a normal parenting relationship around allowing the girl to know
whom to complain to if that time comes."
Even if you think it's all well-intentioned, consider this: "...Why
do well intentioned people trying in all honesty and effort to accomplish
organizational missions make terrible decisions... Groupthink, where bad
decision making behind closed doors by 'the few' adversely affect the many,
is a scary part of group behavior. Why? Because the symptoms of it are
a part of everyday organizational behavior. Groupthink happens in various
forms, all the time. When a group gets together to accomplish a task within
a finite amount of time, they must limit the arguments (dissent), believe
they are moral, hold off competitors, and ultimately, create the illusion
of unanimity within its stakeholders."
Parenting Evaluators and GALs: Caselaw Tactics and Strategies
Custody and Visitation in Domestic Violence Situations
Victims of Domestic Violence
DVLeap brief in 2010 case (Washington, DC) arguing some of the constitutional issues
More from DVLeap
D. A., False promise of parenting coordination, Matrimonial Strategist,
"The Court's parenting coordinator orders unconsitutionally
delegate judicial power and violate due process... The Special Master Order's requirement that Appellant
pay for the parenting coordinators to whom she objects violates law and public policy... The Special
Master Order requiring Appellant to waive her medical privilege violates her statutory and
constitutional rights to privacy..."
Delegation of Judicial Authority to Experts, A. G. Behjani, 2007 Utah L. Rev. 823
CCFC Amicus Brief, Tadros v. Doyne (discovery issues,
due process undermined by psych practitioners)
Fla. Gov. Jeb Bush explains 2004 veto of parenting coordinator legislation
Paper for Florida Senate, 2004-5
Report" of the FlaAFCC Taskforce lobbying for parenting coordination
of unconstitutional judicial mandate for involuntary PC appointment (Florida)
Order of Referral to Parenting Coordinator (Florida)
on parenting coordination bill in Florida and domestic violence
Hampshire Parenting Coordination Handbook
Parenting Coordinator Guidelines (aspirational generalities, no malfeasance
(Hastings case malfeasance)
of control parenting coordinator and a recused judge who relied on him (Wade case, FL 3rd DCA, 2013)
"...a forum in which
sniping can continue unabated... [M]ost jurisdictions do not sufficiently
address issues of due process... When neither evidentiary rules nor due
process protections apply ... the probability of unjust decisions is increased...
Can those who are being paid to render a service objectively evaluate the
need for or effectiveness of that service... we must not lose sight of
the various elements of the process that create a risk of iatrogenic harm."
to Represent Parents Accused of Child Abuse (Florida Bar CLE) (hint,
CASE MANAGERS -- an obscene concept (April 2012 article Kansas)
Kansas brief on this CASE MANAGEMENT case, Karen Williams
Shrinks Gone Wild Willick Law Group, Nevada
Shrinks Gone Wild 2 Willick Law Group, Nevada
Decision includes information about judicial bias warranting recusal as well as guidance on what constitutes
an inappropriate referral for a psychological evaluation.
The Florida judge relied on the ridiculous musings of parenting coordinator Chicago attorney
Howard Rosenberg. (Good work by Lisa Macci, attorney for the mom.)